When I was a kid, I groaned when stuck with listening to the conversations of “old” people. They talked about their illnesses, marriages, deaths, divorces and other incredibly personal matters. Being young and healthy with no marriage on the horizon, it seemed like watching soap operas to listen to my family members talk about such stuff.
Years later, while directing a community nature center in Pueblo, Colorado, I realized that life’s passages – life, death, marriage, divorce, disability – are universals. We all have those to face and they matter very much. They are only boring when youthful exuberance is raging.
At the nature center we learned that we could find win-win relationships with local people by being a unique service center during these times. One of our first efforts was to create memorial gardens. We identified places on our grounds to install demonstration xeriscapes (water saving gardens). A bereaved family looking for a public place to donate money in memory of a recently deceased loved one would pay $1,500 to $3,000 for a memorial garden that included a small marker recognizing the gift. Months after each of these gardens were installed I would see families gathering on our grounds for a picnic, or a prayer, or a walk that included gathering around the memorial garden for a spiritual moment to remember a loved one. Some of these memorial gardens led to family members becoming volunteers or donors in other ways. Their connection to a loved one was linked to the place. And the memorial gardens demonstrated a water saving approach to landscaping with native plants, another good thing.
I recently attended a meeting of the Association of Nature Center Administrators in Jackson Hole and listened to Gordon Maupin, Executive Director of The Wilderness Center in Wilmot, Ohio, talk about their new “green” cemetery at Foxfield Preserve (http://www.foxfieldpreserve.org ). As a nature center, they are buying farm ground to convert to native prairie and forest that will permit natural burials without embalming or individual graver markers. There is a growing demand for these ways to return to the earth without caskets, vaults, formalin and monuments. Foxfield Preserve is likely the first modern “green” cemetery at a nature center in the U.S. This kind of facility can be financially rewarding for the organization. Traditional U.S. funerals and burials are expensive in the U.S. and these eco-cemeteries can be a great way to increase natural habitat while offering people a cost-effective alternative for burial. Also traditional cemeteries lock up an unbelievable amount of natural resources and poisons in the soil each year (check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eco-cemetery).
Preserving open space near urban areas while giving people a place to “recycle” themselves probably sounds morbid if you are young and planning on living many more decades. As we get older, we get very pragmatic about all this and want a plan that matches our beliefs. Many of us do not want to be the next mummified burial of our time to be unearthed millennia later by archaeologists. We are willing to get back to the Earth in the most basic ways.
At the nature center in Pueblo we also offered a great place to host a wedding or birthday on the waterfront on the Arkansas River for a reasonable fee. These are memory making times for young people especially and a great revenue source for a zoo, museum, nature center, aquarium or historic site. These can also lead to more in-depth relationships with people after the special event. They will always remember that special wedding or birthday party in a unique natural setting.
I never figured out the win-win situation for people facing a divorce but it probably existed under my radar. People recently separated or divorced often turn to a spiritual release or uplifting daily experience by walking a trail, volunteering at a raptor center or helping with special events. When our lives seem to fall apart, we have to find ways to heal and interpretive sites offer a retreat from life’s trials and tribulations, even if only for a few moments each day.
The National Association for Interpretation has a location on our website at http://www.interpnet.com/about_nai/memoriam.shtml where you can read about colleagues who have passed on. New blogging software allows friends and family to make comments about the person being recognized, while reading the thoughts of others. A beloved professor, a good friend, a former supervisor or an employee can be remembered not only for their good works but for their many good friends. Sometimes these memorial recognition websites result in memorial donations from friends in memory of the person. That helps the organization live on and do good works while providing ways for others to show their appreciation.
Life’s passages are joyful, painful, uplifting, enduring and important. Think about how your organization helps people through life’s passages. You may find a wonderful win-win relationship that is lasting and loving. Please share what you have done in this area of life’s passages in the comments section below or comment on what you think about these ideas.
-Tim Merriman







